I have been paying and spending time getting in to this rollercoaster. It's like wanting to ride it all over again. But then, sometimes, I just want to unstrap myself and fall.
Mixed up sentiments befall in my life. There's exuberance, melancholy, the feeling of surrendering and bliss. These create my entire identity. I've been discovering my real self and change to what is better for me and to the people around me. The shift from being embittered to submissive. Sometimes, I just want to be happy but things are somehow out of place, times when I want to cry but then find reasons why I should smile and be glad once in a while, certain incidents when I want to give up and let go of this thin string that holds me up. Well I guess these events make me zealous about my subsistence. It won't happen without its own purpose.
The people around me.
They're the ones who make my life undamaged. Smiles do make me happy or even a greeting. A hug makes me feel like I am loved. Laughs make me realize that life goes on. And about the tears, it's a way for me to feel good and how I release all the sadness that has been hindering me to be contented.
The feeling of being upside down this rollercoaster is just not right. I struggle because I'm scared of falling, falling hard on the ground and stop breathing. Though there's something strapped on me for my safety. But sometimes, safety can not be present. You can't be sure of it. It's similar to feeling secured because of individuals around you who you know will never leave you and who'll fight for you, however when you wake up just one morning, they're all gone, leaving you single-handed.
My life's black and white, at times dull but still worthy. Nevertheless, I feel pleased because a rainbow still appears every now and then. I'm currently riding this rollercoaster and I'm on my 15th round, discovering life.
♥ Vindicated @ 11.9.05
THE SUSPECT
Abbie. Abbiebells. Bella. Isabelle. Seventeen. Broke. Still functioning. An aspiring photographer. Guitarist of her band, Taken. Wants to study abroad. Will become a dentist. A Komu member since first year. God-fearing. Not a snob. A music enthusiast. An Incubus, TBS and Mae fan. Does sing. Does dance. Currently learning to play the violin.
DEAR LOVIES
Dear reader,
Everything seen on this blog are my psychotic creations.
PLEASE RESPECT. That's all I ask of you, people.All pictures and doodles are copyrighted, send me messages or hit me through the tagboard if you got interested on pictures and the like. NEVER TRY RIGHT CLICKING. It'll be of no use anyway. :P Hehe.
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Since May of 2005
creatures of different kinds visited this blog.
Abbie. Abbiebells. Bella. Isabelle. Seventeen. Broke. Still functioning. An aspiring photographer. Guitarist of her band, Taken. Wants to study abroad. Will become a dentist. A Komu member since first year. God-fearing. Not a snob. A music enthusiast. An Incubus, TBS and Mae fan. Does sing.