I will never forget that day. You cheered me up for I was really down that time. With that 4 word message you sent me, I've always believed that you'll stay that way.
Time and again, I thought you will always be my best friend though it all started with a gag. But then again, I'm thankful that you tried to portray as my best friend and tried to act as my best friend. You've made me feel that in a way. With your simple acts of kindness and sympathy over my wretched life, I considered you the greatest friend.
You were someone who understood all my peculiar troubles and my innumerable insecurities, someone who cheered me up during the ups and downs of my existence. I never asked God for another friend to replace you! Because I know you'll be the only one who can figure out all the things that has been running through my mind. You were somebody who can appreciate my "ka-cornihan" even if you always annoy me with your "hirits". I still did appreciate that. I still consider myself fortunate to have met someone who did all this.
Things turned out differently. Yes, it is my fault to be very assuming. You've never really stayed or even been there for me. You were just there when you need something from me. And I've been there for you all along. I don't regret it. I'm not even taking it against you for I was happy to be helping who I thought was best friend. I never really saw the negative upshots of it. Because I know, I was doing it all for you and it will even strengthen our friendship. Still, it didn't. It even made it lose our amity and made a huge gap between us.
Why do I have to sacrifice things just for you to be happy? Or even feel contented? I hope it did somehow make you feel thankful for me, even a bit. Just by knowing that, I'm not regretting on giving up so much for you. I'm satisfied.
Now, it feels like I'm just a stranger to you. It's like it's our first time to know each other even if it has been 3 years. 3 consecutive years of pretending you're my best friend. I might sound stupid here, but that has been my dilemma. If you really consider me as your best friend or is it just because for the name? I'm a little confused. I'm on both sides. Whether I'll hate you and forget our friendship or stay as your "best friend" and still be the same someone who you can run to every time.
But then, I'd rather choose my second option even though I know I'll risk alot again. It's better if you know there's someone you can always reach. Even if you don't do that for me.
And now, I'll be the one to tell you..
"Siyempre, Ikaw pa, bestfriend."
♥ Vindicated @ 11.12.05
THE SUSPECT
Abbie. Abbiebells. Bella. Isabelle. Seventeen. Broke. Still functioning. An aspiring photographer. Guitarist of her band, Taken. Wants to study abroad. Will become a dentist. A Komu member since first year. God-fearing. Not a snob. A music enthusiast. An Incubus, TBS and Mae fan. Does sing. Does dance. Currently learning to play the violin.
DEAR LOVIES
Dear reader,
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Since May of 2005
creatures of different kinds visited this blog.
Abbie. Abbiebells. Bella. Isabelle. Seventeen. Broke. Still functioning. An aspiring photographer. Guitarist of her band, Taken. Wants to study abroad. Will become a dentist. A Komu member since first year. God-fearing. Not a snob. A music enthusiast. An Incubus, TBS and Mae fan. Does sing.